A few words on the strip beloved by all (including people as far away as Iceland, according to the official website), populated by some of the most appalling (Sally's mom) and most groovy (Ted) characters on the MP. Can you guess which strip I'm talking about?? Why, it's Sally Forth, of course! I'm, just going to touch on a few issues that have been running through the ol' collective unconscious (though why I need to tell you anything when we're really just a hive mind, I don't really know).
First of all, is everyone familiar with Greg Howard? He's the lawyer-turned-'Mics-Artist who created SF in the '80s. He was some schmuck who couldn't draw:
After 10 years, he just inexplicably left the strip, turning things over to Francesco Marculiano and some artist, who never seems to get any credit. That's right, FM doesn't draw the fucking thing at all! There's a division of labor in place, because surely no human could both give voice to the divine Ted and simultaneously draw a little line on Sally's face to represent her one permanent emotion (which is.... snideness? Is that even an emotion?)
Anyway, let's talk about what's been happening, namely the decline and fall of the second grooviest character in SF, the love of Isaac Pirie's life, future mother of his children Freedom Trail Pirie and Old North Church Pirie: Faye. Faye obviously rules! Remember the rock band that consisted of Hilary on drums and Faye on drums? That would never have happened without Faye and her badass little denim vest. But lo, what is this we see on the horizon? The assimilation of our heroine of cool into the flock of sheep that is the elementary school crowd! I mean, in 6ht grade I started combing my hair so I wouldn't get made fun of so much, and the following year I bought a Champion sweatshirt to try to fit in (of course I bought a purple one, so I was mocked just as heavily as before), but come one, I wasn't as cool as Faye to begin with. She was ever the free thinker, ever the iconoclast, while I was ever the schlep in a Def Leppard T-shirt. What does this mean for the world, that one of the shining lights on the 'MP has been so callously extinguished? Or will she rise again, phoenix-like, from the ashes of complacency and a polka-dot blouse?
Perhaps more importantly, what the heck is her ethnic background?? What's that you say? It's obvious, she's white like everybody else? Well check this out:
This is taken from the Oakland Tribune, and though poorly scanned by yours truly, the fact is that Faye's skin is printed in half tone, while Hilary's is not. What gives? Is Faye a member of an ethnic minority? Does the Tribune color folks in so there'll be more black people on the 'MP? Let's just say that a little internet delving reveals that in full color, everybody looks the same: White as a sheet. In fact, I think there has never been a single black person in SF, ever. So the mystery remains unsolved. All we can do is pray on bended knee that Faye, be she black, white or greyish, be returned to us as the Queen of Cool, the Paragon of Party, the Goddess of Grunge that she once was. So say we all.
